‘Miss Sally Umbrella’
Artist Unknown – sourced from Pinterest
The day they chopped down the last tree on earth was the day the humans stopped breathing. No oxygen, no humans.
A few of us got lucky. We’d already had our brains transferred to robots. Not just any old robots. Proper human looking robots with eyes that see, ears that hear, mouths that spoke and hands that created things. We didn’t need to eat nor drink. That was useful as there were no farms and no rain. The extra plus was that we robots didn’t need oxygen. That was handy on a planet without any.
My brain settled into its new home without any major problems. A couple of headaches and I’ll admit I missed being not able to watch The Arsenal or have poached eggs. The name the other robots gave me was ‘Zoolon the Musical Android’. I could still play my electric guitars. Solar power sorted that out.
Being a robot meant I was immortal if I stayed safe and never got myself killed. It also meant that none of us need ever breed. No point in it. We could build new robots but the new ones had no human brains as we’d run out of those. These robots didn’t have feelings and had no creativity but were useful just focused on doing stuff. They mainly built space ships and did the clearing up of desert dust. Music was an alien thing to them.
Everything was going really well for a while. We’d set up camps on Earth, The Moon and on Mars. Then came a time of conflict. The robots with human brains decided that there wasn’t any reason to keep the robots without human brains. Like they were lesser beings. Racism had returned to Earth. My hateful lot started to dismantle the robots without human brains forgetting that they had been programmed to defend themselves. They were pretty good at killing their human brain enemies. After a massive battle all that was left was just me and a pile of robot parts of both types. I never took part in the war as I don’t do racism.
However, I’d forgotten about Sally Umbrella, a robot without a human brain. She’d been on Mars at the time of the battle. She was called Sally Umbrella because she always had an umbrella with her. No one knew why because it never rained on Earth any more.
When she got back to Earth I had to tell her what had happened. She wasn’t meant to have emotions but on hearing what I had to say a single tear dripped from her eye. When the tear drop landed, all of a sudden a tiny twig with a single green leaf popped up out of the ground. Seeing I was confused she told me that it was a new born tree. An oak. After that she cried some more and a whole mass of new born trees appeared. She said they’d been ‘hidden beneath’ forever waiting to grow. Two magical things had happened. Sally Umbrella had evolved a brain as good as any human brain plus she had caused the trees to return.
Not long after, some dark clouds turned up. I hadn’t seen any clouds for hundreds of years. Then the rain. Buckets of rain. That’s when Sally Umbrella opened her umbrella to keep us both dry. Maybe she knew something from before? Maybe that was why she carried an umbrella? I never asked.
However, she did ask me if I thought regular humans would evolve again like before. All I could say was, “I hope not.”
Since then 200 million+ years have passed. The forests are back. No sign of humans, although quite a lot of bees. I did see a pretty friendly orangutan in one of the trees yesterday. Sally Umbrella was shaking her head looking ever so worried. I like Sally Umbrella. I think I might write her a song.
Also try this on for size if you fancy the idea. The ‘Bullish Grove’. Enjoy;
Apart from the Sally pic – Copyright © 2019 Zoolon Audio. Music & Artwork. All rights reserved. Unauthorised copying, reproduction, hiring, lending, public performance and broadcasting prohibited.