sandgate3 (2)

(A photo I took of the grounds of 15th century Sandgate Castle where I had planned to bury Brian if the worst came to the worst)

Followers of this blog will know I regularly meet up with my mate Brian the Sparrow who lives with his harem of adoring girl sparrows harbourside. Presently, the Disney Cruise Liner is moored up in the harbour. That means tourists are in town.

Yesterday afternoon I was at the café there. I find, for reasons medical science can’t prove, that a hot chocolate helps ease my hay fever. Odd but true. Anyway, there I was sat outside trying to think, but ending up listening to a group of American tourists just off the ship, chatting about this and that. I got the impression that they had all met up onboard, rather than knew each other from before.

One of them was really huge and stuffing steak and chips. All the while she was moaning on and on that portion sizes in Europe were far too small, although to me what she had in front of her looked a massive amount of food. Her fellow tourists were scoffing a simple sandwich each and seemed happy enough. Whatever, she hoovered up her food in no time. Her plate no longer raneth over.

At this point, Brian the Sparrow, a polite little bloke who’d never interrupt while someone was eating, landed on the table next to where she was sat. He was on the lookout for orts (a Devonian word that means ‘left-overs’; I know this because I was brought up in Devon).  Spotting Brian, she thumped him away with the back of her hand causing Brian to fall from the table. At first, I thought she’d killed him and was about to lose the plot big time. Fortunately, Brian rediscovered his co-ordination just before he hit the ground and flew away to the safety of the hedgerow where he lives.

An American bloke sat opposite her saw the anger on my face and just shook his head in despair as if to say, ‘On behalf of the United States of America, let me apologize for the wicked actions of one of our own’. I nodded back in acknowledgement, accepting the apology on behalf of Her Majesty.

That, however wasn’t the end of it. The lady, now stuffed to the gunnels announced she fancied an ice-cream cone and as she came out of the café holding the cone to her lips she hadn’t noticed that Archie the Seagull had spotted her. He swooped down and nicked it. Nice one, Archie!

At this point, I must add that the fact that this cruel lady was American is an irrelevance. Every box of nations will always have a few rotten eggs.  We’ve certainly got enough of them in the UK.


Time for some music. The title track from the album.

By the way, the links to my album, ‘DREAM RESCUER’ are via the track above and right of this page. It costs not much, and is available worldwide.  If you fancy buying it and feel able to post a review on Bandcamp, I’d appreciate it.

Copyright © 2017 Zoolon Audio.  All rights reserved.  Unauthorised copying, reproduction, hiring, lending, public performance and broadcasting prohibited.




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  1. I loved this. Hope Brian is okay. If you see him again , you must tell us, Jurg. You just can’t leave him at the mercy of the environment! By environmental, I mean all elements natural and human lol!

        1. Rest assured, Lady Yasmin. I forgot that it’s Sunday tomorrow, so I’ll check out Brain and send Eric the Carrier Pigeon over with a message.

        2. I’ve only got two shoulders, Lady Yasmin. I have a parrot on one, an owl on the other and a carrier pigeon looking jealously at the other two birds. The truth of it is that I need a third shoulder, but that would mean a third arm. Only then would I become a freak of nature.

        3. Normally I would, Lady Yasmin but he’s developed a taste for exceedingly strong curry so I don’t dare to let him sit on my head at the moment. I can tell you, Brian is OK. I saw him earlier today with, Ruby his new wife. Al is well.

        4. From my research, Lady Yasmin it seems that girl sparrows are the most promiscuous of all of the bird species. Apparently it’s how the sparrows species survives. They all make for the alpha-Sparrow and, well that speaks for itself.

        5. Some birds mate for life. It’s the little birds that have to breed best they can for their species to survive. Odd, but true, Lady Yasmin.

  2. This made me laugh. Bo’s grandmother would be just like this: she’s used the water hose to spray down bird’s nests, she’s taken a shovel to smashing turtle eggs. And her “kids”–Ben’s uncles and aunt–eat just as you describe.

    I’m glad Brian the Sparrow is all right. Bash has taken to naming the rabbits who come to our yard–well, he’s given one name to any rabbit he sees: Sammy. 🙂 And as we’re horrid with yard care, Sammy loves to eat our weeds. The kids, but Bash especially, just loves it. He holds up his own little plush rabbit named Hoppy to the window and pretends to eat breakfast with him. Yeah, it’s pretty adorable. xxxxxx

    1. I hope the grandmother is off the Christmas list? That’s terrible. I mean she can eat as much as she wants, but destroying birds nest should warrant a prison sentence in my book. It’s good your kids are all for wildlife though. Let’s hear it for Hoppy and Sammy.

      1. Oy, she is a matriarch to the nth degree. She’s livid we won’t let Blondie go on the family boat because she hasn’t passed her swimming lessons yet. “I never learned to swim, and I’m fine.”
        Only because the Grim Reaper is scared to death of you, lady…

        1. My grandmother was a bit like it, scary lady, but she kept giving me money so I overlooked her fixations. Germs was a big thing with her.

    1. I wanted to hit back but I have manners and she was a lady – if it was a bloke I’d have a different take on the matter. Even so I’d happily see her banged up for swotting a sparrow. The sparrow population in England is falling, we don’t need people trying to kill them.

        1. Thank you. Brian is OK, I saw him a bit earlier today. The sparrow beater has left town – well, I think she has as the ship has left the harbour. People who treat any creature the way she did ought to be locked-up.

  3. I can’t believe some people would treat a sparrow that way! Well, I can unfortunately. Yes, sadly there are jerks of all nationalities who mistreat animals. Brian sounds like a pretty tough bird, though. I’m glad he recovered so quickly.
    It seems your life is filled with these strange coincidences like the ‘instant karma’ moment 🙂

    1. Thank you. Sometimes I worry about going out. Whenever I go away from the studio things happen that change my day – sometimes good, often not.

  4. George, poor Brian being at the receiving end of a shrew. Fortunately he wasn’t injured and thankfully Archie was able to return the favor. I absolutely love your photo, it’s one I wish I could climb into and stay for a good long time. A stunning and haunting image, capturing beautifully the past and the present. Please enjoy the rest of your Saturday. ~ Mia, R & E

    1. Thank you, Mia. If Brian had to go, that place in the photo is where I’d have put him. There’s a hedge at the side, he’d like that.

  5. I’m happy Brian was able to recover, and way to go Archie. I never have understood people who don’t like little animals. Especially birds.

  6. Brian the Sparrow returns! Ooooh that was a Miss Piggy who didn’t have a Kermit – I think the seagull told her off in the end 😉 Karma!! May Brian stay safe… and you too. Hot chocolate for hay-fever, eh?

    1. I don’t know why, but hot chocolate does help – true. I did try to research it yet came up with nothing relevant. I need to find another serious sufferer who hasn’t tried this method and see what they think. I’m pretty sure Brian is OK by the way. Sparrows only get 3 years life in the ‘wild’ (although in captivity – whatever that means, one once lived until it was 23!!!!) – so it’s best they get half a chance of living without humans ruining it all.

  7. I am sorry to admit that in fact, America has a higher percentage of cruel jerks than most other nations. And I’m sorry. We deserve to have Piers Morgan for that. I get it.

    1. I bet we – in percentage terms – have just as many cruel jerks, if not more. Also, no one, not a living soul deserves Piers Morgan – what a something, something, something, over-blown something, that something bloke is!

        1. Trump doesn’t come over Presidential, does he? He doesn’t even come over an American – apart from having an American accent. I think he’s a plant from the Planet Uranus, personally.

        2. I wonder if he has a big key inserted from time to time to wind him up. He looks like he might be powered by clockwork.

        3. He should be on the under-card,
          not top bill at the show,
          when not twisting all that’s proven,
          he makes his cruel words up on the go

    1. Thanks. The only worry about France is their appetite for small flying things! The fact she was American is OK. We’ve a lot more worse than here over here. I can report that I just saw Brian (plus Ruby, the youngest of his wive’s) down at the harbour and he’s his usual self again.

        1. Brian is not like the others. I can always recognize him, because he has a ton of extra black feathers on his chest – plus the fact he comes right up close to humans he remembers and trusts.

  8. Hot Chocolate does help with hay-fever. Its part of a good medicine.

    I know what you mean about Americans. In America there are 50/50. Bad rotten eggs and the organic good eggs. Humans lack compassion, humans need to reboot their human behavior towards one another.

    1. Thanks for the tip about hot chocolate. It does seem to help, while others just laugh when I tell them! As to Americans, I have to say that stat with the English is 30/70 with the latter having zero compassion.

      1. I couldn’t agree more about Americans. As I am an American myself and I am embarrassed of my own species. It disappoints to know that we live in a country where ‘Pride’, & ‘Rich’ are dominant force. It’s pathetic if you ask me.

        1. I agree, Charlie. Don’t forget it’s the same here. The vote for Brexit was mainly caused by an electorate who loathed immigrants and now reveal their lack of compassion when it comes to true refugees with no place safe to call home. I often say that I prefer animals to people – that’s the truth.

        2. Your right. I’d rather be an animal than a human being. However, there are repercussions that come to becoming an animal. Sometimes though, I wish I was an alien from another planet. I’m sure they don’t have a complicated system like we do. I mean who knows right?

        3. I reckon if it’s in a conscious state, then the scope for foul play will always exist, human or alien. Maybe everything would be better if we weren’t conscious – maybe like goldfish, with a 10 second memory span?

    1. I fear she must be, but never forget in England we have our own demons doing much the same thing. It’s all a bit sad, worldwide.

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