Brian, ‘The Don of The Sparrow Mafia’ wasn’t there at first. There were twenty or so of his mob flying from table to table trying to nick a few crumbs here and there, that’s all. Then, when he eventually showed up, all the other bloke sparrows did a runner and as ever his harem of girl sparrows took to the bushes and watched his every move.
As you can see from the picture Brian let me take his portrait. Nice touch, I thought. I seem to be getting on well with Brian. He didn’t even mind that I wasn’t sharing my croissant with him (I did leave him the crumbs when I left).
The thing was a rich looking well-padded Italian lady (she sounded Italian), not ‘old, old’ but certainly not young, wearing expensive sunglasses, smothered in jewellery and lipstick, was watching me take the picture and she asked what I was doing. The inside of my head answered, “Baking a cake, what does it look like I’m doing?” Being polite, I just pointed at the camera, then pointed at Brian. I whispered to Brian, “We don’t like her” and Brian nodded back.
She took a sip from a glass of what probably wasn’t diet lemonade, then she said, “You look so very, very worried.” My team, The Arsenal were playing Manchester City a bit later in the afternoon and I was worried they might lose again. It must have showed. Anyway, I replied, “I’m worried about Man City.” She replied, “MAN City, sounds like pure heaven to me, darling boy.” Scary stuff. Also, the way she emphasised the word, ‘MAN’ sounded predatory. After that she gave me what I can only describe as a ‘knowing wink’ asking if I minded her moving across to my table. That’s when I decided to escape.
Driving home I had the random thought that I should have said, ‘Manchester City’, not its commonly used shortened form ‘Man’ City, grateful that I’d avoided the old bird’s clutches.
This post is an update on the previous ‘Brian the Sparrow’ post; https://wordpress.com/post/zoolonaudio.wordpress.com/556
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