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RANDOM THOUGHT OF ZOOLON

by George Blamey-Steeden

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This is a true story. 100% true.

A coincidence happened when was out driving yesterday. I wish I had had a camera with me and I hadn’t been driving, although if I hadn’t been in the car I wouldn’t have known about the coincidence that was about to happen.

I was only half listening to the radio. There was a debate about health issues going on. One of the experts said that there were no benefits at all in any person being obese. She seemed to be making a fair point.

Then, just moments later I saw someone walking along the pavement holding onto about 8, maybe 10 huge see-through plastic bags. Each bag contained about a dozen helium balloons. It was the weirdest looking thing. The old man carrying the balloons was thin way beyond average thin and looked worried. He was walking on tiptoes trying not to take off.

That’s when my random thought happened. The woman who said that there were no benefits in a person being obese had got it all wrong. If the bloke holding the helium balloons had been obese he’d have had no problem with the effect of helium on gravity. And that, I think, shows that there can be a benefit for those who might be obese for they have no fear when carrying a reasonable amount of helium balloons.

I should have parked up and phoned into the radio station to prove the expert wrong, but didn’t.

I’m still trying to work out why he was carrying so many helium balloons. He was walking away from town, and as far as I know there are no bespoke helium balloon shops in town. Odd.

I must add that I’m not having a dig at the obese. I respect everyone for what they are, apart from serial killers, paedophiles and the van driver who shattered my wing mirror.

(picture courtesy of gettyimages)

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43 thoughts on “RANDOM THOUGHT OF ZOOLON”

      4. Filled with soft sand, a large number of balloons, carefully placed about doorways could prevent houses being flooded in times when rivers overflow, plus they’d add a bit of colour.

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  3. George, what a seriously charming event. I certainly hope that the balloon man had the needed faculties to let go of the balloons if he was about to become airborne. Sad, no photos, they would have made marvelous greeting cards. I hope you’ve had a good Tuesday so far, enjoy the rest of it. ~ Rexie The Cat Who Fell to Earth & Mia of Terra Firma

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    1. So far it’s gone amazingly well in terms of creative things. You know, I should have added that the old bloke with the balloons was walking up hill, out of town. I wonder if he got the balloons to go up the hill easier then realized he bought too many? It is playing on my mind. What happened to my number one fan? I’m worried, Rexie the hopefully gravity defying cat & Mia who chose not the copy Icarus

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      1. That’s great news! You’re kidding? He was walking up hill and out of town, that’s the sort of story that you just can’t make up. It has been playing on my mind too. I was thinking that once the balloons started to lose their helium, the thin man would fall to earth -> David Bowie in the movie, “The Man Who Fell to Earth -> Rexie The Cat That Fell to Earth & Mia of Solid Earth. Not to worry, you’re number one fan is safe and fast asleep with his bestie, Puff Daddy. If you’re a cat, it’s the perfect day to sleep enjoying the sounds made by the rain. I’ve always adored the story of Icarus, especially the beautiful feathers. ~ Lightfoot & Feather

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    2. The direction the bloke was taking lead to open countryside. I’d overlooked the bit about helium escaping. I wonder if he was aiming at a private suicide attempt. Although with all the cliffs around here to jump off that’s probably unlikely. Enjoy your day, Lightfoot & Feather.
      George

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  7. Observations like these are the stuff of story, you know. 😉 Perhaps he was trying to lure kids from their house on the edge of town. Maybe he was trying to help his lame dog bounce about the dog park. Maybe he wanted to be like the old man from the movie UP and lift his house, or at least his bicycle. Maybe the love of his life is single at last, and he wants to relive the one day they had together as children at the carnival.
    Anything and everything’s possible, right?

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    1. I’ve come to think he was a random nutter. Although, given his age, he probably wanted them to walk up the hill a bit easier, and, in his excitement over-ordered. One balloon above the optimum spells trouble. You’d think the place that sold them to him would have a weighing machine so as to predict what his optimum would be. If not, why not? They have a responsibility.

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      2. That’s a good point. Maybe, last time he was in the shop he was rude to the staff, so this time when he came in for balloons they thought they’d stuff him by adding just the one freebie balloon.

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      4. I’ve got 5 songs for the new album on the go. I can’t cope with Mr Balloon bloke, a poor man’s Icarus he would be, flying up to heaven above, later crashing stone cold dead in a tree – and so on.

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      1. Maybe the point is that one should never state things with overconfidence. I think it was Socrates who said the only thing I’m sure of is that I don’t know anything…

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  9. “I must add that I’m not having a dig at the obese. I respect everyone for what they are, apart from serial killers, paedophiles and the van driver who shattered my wing mirror.”

    I concur – although, you forgot to add rapists, racists, and abusers of animals. Personally, I respect those who respect themselves enough to respect others. Does that make sense? It does to me…

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  10. Things seldom happen without reason, so there must be a message for you personally. By the way, just the other day I watched a video where a man was blown away by our latest stormy wind, but a heavier lady stood strong on her feet, just swaying a little bit. I watched the video twice, and decided on taking up a diet. I think it was a message for me, because I am sitting most of the time and this extra weight I got after Christmas is dangerous for my health.

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    1. I’ve been on a health kick for the last month. I just wanted to improve my diet. Pasta is my favourite food but I don’t eat it unless I’ve done a 1,000 calories in the gym first. Best of luck with that.

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